Can’t teach an old dog new tricks

tmimnIt seems as though Bill Schmalfeldt, despite continued failure in all fronts, wants to keep using the same tricks, never learning from his mistakes, while trying to intimidate individuals who aren’t afraid of him.

Schmalfeldt added six anonymous defendants in his Second Amended Complaint. The purpose was to add placeholders so that during discovery, he believes he will be able to subpoena WordPress and ISP’s of individuals who are making comments on the various blogs. Once he identifies them, he will add them to the suit.

He obviously did not think this through because he would be responsible for paying the costs of having WordPress and the various ISP’s fulfill the subpoenas. His pauperis status would not save him from those costs.

So why did he choose six? No idea. Nevermind he never amended the claims in his complaint to reference the anonymous defendants.

Because the court has found his SAC is not in proper form,  Schmalfeldt will have to name his anonymous defendants and provide summons forms to the court. In addition, before he makes any new filings, he has to provide certificates of service to the court saying he made service to the anonymous defendants for each filing.

In a recent blog post, he named names, assigning them to the various anonymous placeholders, including yours truly.  One of those named individuals is an attorney, and the recently adjudicated (now twelve times) stalker is keeping a close watch on him as I’m sure he is with the others.


Seems to me that if you’re really interested in trying to salvage your case, you should probably focus on bringing it into proper form, rather than worrying about what the anonymous defendants are doing. Dropping them from the case would have been strategically better because one attorney is now representing the original defendants and the paperwork would be much simpler, even though he will still lose.

Schmalfeldt had originally agreed to drop the six anonymous defendants as the easiest course to bring his case back to proper form.  The four original defendants had agreed through their attorney to allow Schmalfeldt to file a motion dismissing the anonymous defendants.

Schmalfeldt, however, changed his mind.

Why? Because a major butthurt boil started swelling again when he visited Hogewash! So he chose to keep them in and proclaimed it was all Hoge’s fault.


Not only has he now made his case that much harder to manage, some of those deadlines will be right around the time he has to go Westminster, Maryland, and stand trial as a defendant. On the first day, he has a show cause hearing before Judge Hecker and has to explain why he ignored the Judge’s order to appear for a previous show cause hearing.

The show cause hearing is for Schmalfeldt illicitly taping a portion of his testimony in a hearing to compel discovery and sharing it on the internet, in violation of court rules. Hoge petitioned the court on this violation and Judge Hecker issued the Show Cause order. Schmalfeldt chose not to attend, citing his inability to travel due to his “Parkinson’s Disease”.

Schmalfeldt had sent two improper motions to allow him to appear via Skype. When the court ignored his improper filings, Schmalfeldt cited the American Disabilities Act as justification for ignoring the order. After all, the Judge should have sympathy for him in his frail condition, right?

One of the penalties that Judge Hecker could use to sanction Schmalfeldt is jail time, and it could be for a significant amount of time, especially in light of his appearance at a No Contact for Stalking hearing in North Carolina for Sarah Palmer.  Despite having such a progressive disease, it seems as though Schmalfeldt was more than capable of getting to Maryland.

The larger point in all this is that Schmalfeldt is in a very serious predicament and his lesions (legions?) of butthurt are affecting his ability to think rationally. Of course, Schmalfeldt is stalking a more than capable lawyer which could mean a ton more paperwork if dragged into this suit.

What happens if the six defendants are added, they all get lawyers and each one files two or three motions a week?

Even funnier, what if Judge Hecker, who would care even less about Schmalfeldt’s federal case than Judge Brown did in North Carolina, finds him in contempt and gives him a couple weeks in a small suite of the Lockup Hotel, and these attorneys have all submitted motions either before or while he was in Maryland?

As a wise man once said:  Nothing is proceeding as the Cabin Boy™ has hallucinated.

This show is about to become very hilarious.  Stretch those lulz muscles..


…and don’t choke on the popcorn.


19 thoughts on “Can’t teach an old dog new tricks

  1. Lesions and legions, nice.

    There is one item that you forgot. It is true that an attorney for multiple defendants may and almost certainly will file a single motion on their joint behalf, but he will also file motions that pertain to individual defendants. So the motions practice that Witless will face is not cut by 75%.

    Liked by 6 people

  2. The larger point in all this is that Schmalfeldt is in a very serious predicament and his lesions (legions?) of butthurt are affecting his ability to think rationally. Of course, Schmalfeldt is stalking a more than capable lawyer which could mean a ton more paperwork if dragged into this suit.

    Does aside, he’s a carpetbagger trying to float the same claims for the SEVENTH time in the THIRD jurisdiction in THREE years (where he’d lived for just a few weeks) and he’s up against a native SC Lawyer at his home Court in front of a judge that he’s had ELEVEN cases before. A toddler could do the math on this one.

    A good lawyer knows the law.
    A GREAT lawyer knows the judge.
    A DUMBFUCK doesn’t know his ass from a hole in the ground
    Nor the weight of the consequences he’s piled upon himself.

    This time is different. It goes to 11.

    Liked by 10 people

  3. “If the court rejects, I say “Oh well,” marry the woman I love and live my life.”

    ROFL… Oh my William “Parkinson’s faking valor stealing cyberstalking shitbag” Shmalfeldt… you only WISH you could come out of this that unscathed at this point.

    On bad advice from your pedo master you’re now holding the bag in two lawsuits one of which is being handled by an attorney who as you point out has a propensity to settle cases.

    Did it ever occur to you the reason why so many of his cases go to settlement is because the cases he takes deal with law he is so intimately familiar with and containig evidence so rock solid for his clients the opposing side is asking for the settlement?


    Well you will soon. Too bad the ram has tiouched the wall. Time for you to learn the painfully hard lessons about buttburt NOT being a tort and what happens when you white knight evil.

    And you’ll learn it whether you like it or not when team free speech is done with you.

    Take the cure, shitbag,.

    Liked by 6 people

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