Life is full of surprises.

Tonight, the Virginia Cavaliers, the overall number 1 seed in the NCAA tournament, lost its opening round game in the NCAA Men’s Basketball tournament to the #63 team , the University of Maryland – Baltimore County (UMBC) Retrievers, and marks the first time in 136 games that a number one seed has lost its first game.

This also marks the shortest time that 0 perfect brackets have been reached.

(note: it’s possible that “someone” still has a perfect bracket somewhere, but no one is reporting on it.)

UMCB was a twenty point underdog, something that is amazing considering that they won by that margin – a forty point swing.  Anyone who placed bets on the Retrievers to win are probably counting their stack of cash and might possibly be rolling around in it.

And even though it took the 136 game to finally defeat a number one team..

Bill Schmalfeldt’s record of winning anything in life is still at zero.  Every endeavor he’s managed to embark on has ended with failure.

And everyone who has been sued by him still has a perfect bracket.


3 thoughts on “Comparisons

  1. The Scat in the Hat
    Said to his minion di smelly

    The court just called
    it’s on the Telly

    We must leave for the west
    We must leave right now

    Don’t pack anything
    Just go with me now

    So the pungent pair
    Waddled their way

    To a station of misery
    To get underway

    To ‘fornia the yelled
    At the tired old clerk

    The tickets were given
    With the smallest of smirks

    They boarded the bus
    Without the slightest care

    Their odor was acrid
    There were several stares

    And after a fortnight
    One or three

    The bus came to a halt
    With a brake wailing screed

    Get off you two
    Hit the road right now

    I cannot drive further
    You and your cow

    So they were dumped
    In A place quite quirky

    In front of a motel
    It was just okay dokay

    It was across from a place
    Where there were trucks and waffles

    So they went inside
    With their putrid fat shuffle

    I’d like a room
    For a good solid month

    The clerk grew amazed
    At the squalid punks

    Money was swapped
    For pieces of plastic

    The fat gross pair
    Left the clerk quite monastic

    So the losers were ensconced
    In another dark gloom

    The trucks and the waffles
    Were the same type of doom

    After a day
    a day and a night

    The monastic clerk
    Googled with fright

    The name of the blob
    Who lectured his nostrils

    Had a serious past
    Shocking and hostile

    He harassed dead babies
    Mothers with glee

    But that wasn’t all
    Their were stories of pee

    12 restraining orders
    For more babies glared

    To get him thrown out
    Any place that he dared

    To show his fat face
    Without such a care

    And then their were stories
    Of rape of small children

    Of child porn
    Was their sad origin

    To the fat smelly pair
    Of blob and his di

    Wailed at the clerk
    Who firmly denied

    Go back to the south
    Of carolina way

    Because you are not welcome
    You just cannot stay

    They got on a bus
    That opened all the windows

    The way out west
    Is clear for all kiddos

    Liked by 2 people

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