My chair is rather crazy. I think it was having a nightmare. I was coming back from the restroom and it up and attacked me.
The good news is, I came away completely unscathed.
The chair on the other hand..

Guess I’ll need to put a request in to maintenance for a new chair.
(Note: This is not the real chair, but a close proximity of what it looks like. The damage is too gruesome to share and I think the chair should have some dignity and not be photographed in its final moments.)
But were you terribly injured?
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Prognosis is for a complete recovery.
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ISWYDT
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Congratulations on showing more respect to your chair in its final hours than some men do to their own wives.
Inflataskank has so much to look forward to…
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I told you not to let it sit in your chair!
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Heh, “it”…
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“The chair on the other hand..”
Deth thret eleventy11!!!111!!!!1
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It’s obvious the chair in his room doesn’t like him.
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