Retired.. again.

Formerly known as Bill Mathews, the morning show host for a radio station in Guymon, Oklahoma, the Portly Pundit is the latest incarnation of our favorite sack of horse manure, Bill Schmalfeldt.

In a post on his website, he says he “quit” his job and then listed off the names of the nationally syndicated radio hosts – a status he longs to achieve but can never not screw himself over- who have made working at the station difficult because of his “woke liberalism.”

While he tries to convince the few people who even follow him on his social media accounts that he became a victim working under the influence of rational conservative thought, those of us who he’s targeted in the past know it’s a con – he’s never held a job for any length of time since he first retired from debilitating Parkinson’s Disease he claimed had left him unable to physically do anything almost a decade prior.  Remember, Parkinson’s is a progressive disease that never.. gets.. better.

After he secured the radio job with much secrecy, having finally learned his lesson to not taunt the lickspittles, he and the love of his life (#4) were finally joined in the panhandle between Kansas and Texas. They acquired two more pets, cats named Thor and Loki.  Like the victims he’s acquired in his misadventures since the death of wife #3, the fates of the two avenger named feline critters are in question.

It would certainly be a shame if the ASPCA were to receive an anonymous tip along with ample documentation provided from the perp himself of his penchant for abandoning innocent animals.  He goes through more cats than a liberal lesbian professor living in a run down shack. Even worse, it would be terrible if he ended up being in one of their commercials where he is roughly thrown to the ground while being screamed at by feminist volunteers.

I would like to make it quite clear that he is still on my radar because he wanted to be there.  More than once, this valor stealing,  fake Parkinson’s infected plague on common decency has chosen poorly to return to his failed practices of harassment.  He would be wise to keep himself in check.  He should not mistake the lack of posts, outside the normal blog features, as a sign I’m not aware or have been ignoring him.  Far from it, his past threats against me are still within the statute of limitations.

One thing is for sure:  He’s still the pathetic loser who can never get past his own screw-ups. I highly doubt he “quit”.  The best possible outcome was a mutual parting of the ways along the lines of, “You can either leave on your own, or Bubba here can throw your ass out on the street.”

At any rate, welcome back Bill.